(loud chorus of trumpets, the people rejoice)

Oh instant noodles!

You aren’t exactly GOOD, per say. But I love you. You are the only substantial lunch I can find for two dollars. You actually have vegetables, albeit space-dried peas and carrots. And you are hot and salty. So hot and salty that you actually manage to create a wound and rub salt in it, all in one mercurial motion.

Did I mention you are so cheap?

Soooo cheap. Hot. Salty. Fantastic. Space-dried vegetables.

I think you are raising my sodium intake to unhealthy levels, instant noodles, but I don’t care. I’ll have more MSG than…..Madison Square Garden. And I’ll wear it proudly. Because it’s all I can afford.