I loved Queer Eye. I still adore Top Chef. I am even a closet Shear Genius fan. But The Millionaire Matchmaker…

Sorry I got distracted. I’m watching the new Knight Rider and this child actor guest starring is the most grating thing I’ve ever seen. Yikes. Oh KITT. I pine for you.

Anyway, Millionaire Matchmaker or as I shall call it, MM, is pretty much the worst aspects of men and women flaunted in glorious, botox-bloated, fake-tannery display. Sleazy men demand bimbos, and desperate women happily jettison career goals in order to “bag a rich husband.”

It really just makes me want to cry.

And the woman who runs it….I didn’t even bother learning her name. She bears a shocking resemblance to the WWF’s Chyna. She tells these women, these slightly mad women, that they need to wear tight, skimpy outfits (showing off both augmented breasts and well-toned legs) always have long, straight hair, never smoke, and generally just be creepy femme-bots (my phrase not hers).

Maybe I’m old fashioned. Or naive. Or both. I just thought it was our minds and personalities, our bad habits and wild hair that made us attractive to others.

Is this why I always date really lovely guys who just happen to be dirt poor?