You know David Wenham. Don’t you. Yeah, you do. 

If you don’t know the name, you know the face. The super duper handsome Aussie face.

I haven’t seen everything he’s ever done (because that would be insanely creepy) but the things I have seen him in, he’s the best part! Case in point:

1. Lord of the Rings. He played Faramir (fuck, I’m a dork) but was cast because both he and Sean Bean have similar noses – true story. But he’s so good. I found myself chatting to the screen while he was on, like “boy, stab that Orc! Stab that motherfucker!”

2. Van Helsing. Yeah I saw it. Judge me. But he played Carl, the wise-cracking monk, and the only funny part of the film (unless you count Kate Beckinsale’s accent…burn!) and brilliant line delivery during a film that I love in spite of all its badness is not something to be sneered at.

3. Australia. I just saw it last night. What a bizarre fucking movie. I think it should have maybe settled on 1 or 2 genres, rather than try to be about 8 different types of movie. But Hugh Jackman was suitably rugged and handsome. But Wenham, he was such a good villain. You wanted to kill him yourself, but felt bad about it, because he’s so good looking. I’m sure people feel the same way about me all the time. They look at me and want me dead, but then the sun sparkles off my smile and they just can’t bring themselves to do it. Then they give me a high five and I go about my merry way.